You want to hear something really funny?
My new year’s goal was to blog more consistently.
When I announced to my husband that I was finally going to write this blog post, he said “Well, it’s not too bad, it’s only January 13.”
At this rate I’m off to a whopping two whole posts a month! ::snort::
But in all honesty, I really do plan on kicking this blog up a notch this year. Sure, I got off to a slow start, but I have a good excuse.
A really good excuse.
I decided to Konmarie my house. What is Konmarie you ask? It’s a new way of decluttering that has taken the world by storm. You can read all about it in the book called The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo.
So while I have so far done a really terrible job with one of my new year’s resolutions, I would say I’ve done quite excellently with one of my others – to simplify. I already have my second huge pile of stuff ready to go to Good Will and I have barely begun.
I also found out right before Christmas that my baby had fallen off the growth-curve and that I wasn’t making enough milk. I went into full-on, crazy-lady, research mode and a pile of herbs, a mountain of fenugreek, a can of Brewer’s yeast, more night feedings and a fancy-schmancy breast pump later and I can say we are finally on the upswing. Whew! I promise to blog about my discoveries and how this even happened in the first place – it’s quite humbling.
Yes, I have lots of goals this year.
I want to be a better wife, a better mom, a better homemaker, a better blogger, and I want to spend more time reading books and talking to God and serving others. I want to improve my food photography. I want to pass our home-study and continue on our adoption journey.
I want to make a difference.
I have big dreams!
Speaking of dreams, this past month I realized that I have been having the same re-curring dream my whole life. I don’t know how I didn’t realize it sooner. When I was a young kid, I dreamt of finding a secret room in my grandparent’s house. I frequently dreamt about going into that secret place.
Then, as a young adult, that dreamed morphed into finding a bigger secret room inside of a closet. For years I accessed that secret room in my dreams.
Then, as a mom and wife, that dream morphed again. In these dreams I found a whole secret wing to a house. Every time I had that dream I was exploring a new part of that wing. It even had a huge, two-story library full of kid books.
Several weeks ago, it morphed again where someone willed their whole house to our family. It was the largest, most expansive, most utterly ornate house and the whole time the owner (a lady dying of cancer) was showing it to me, I just shook my head and thought “We could never even afford the electricity bill for this place, much less live here.” I kept thinking about how ridiculous our furniture would look in that place and I remember being grateful and terrified at the same time.
After that dream, I realized I had been dreaming this my whole life! I started praying and asking God if He was trying to tell me something. Someone suggested to me that maybe the secret rooms in my dream are like the secret place I go when I spend time in prayer. She suggested that the doubts I was having in the last dream show that I need more faith in order to let God do the big things he wants to do with my life.
So there you have it. My last goal – more faith.